It has been suggested that some of our staff members are not using proper terminology when dealing with other Departments. To help them "get with it", we present you a glossary of

• TO GIVE SOMEONE THE PICTURE: a long, confused and inaccurate statement to a newcomer.
• UNDER CONSIDERATION: never heard of it before.
• A MEETING: a mass milling by masterminds.
• A CONFERENCE: a place where conversations substituted for the dreariness of labor and the loneliness of thought.
• RELIABLE SOURCE: the guy you just met.
• INFORMED SOURCE: the guy who told the guy you just met.
• UNIMPEACHABLE SOURCE: the guy who started the rumor originally.
• WE ARE MAKING A SURVEY: we need more time to think of an answer.
• CLARIFICATION: to fill in the background with so many details that the foreground goes underground.
• A PROGRAM: any assignment that can't be completed by a phone call.
• TO IMPLEMENT A PROGRAM: hire more people and expand the office.
• CHANNELS: the trail left by the interoffice memos.
• TO ACTIVATE: to make carbons and add more names to the memo.
• UNDER ACTIVE CONSIDERATION: we're looking in the files for it.
• COORDINATOR: the guy who has a desk between two expediters.
• REORIENTATION: getting used to work again.
• TO NOTE AND INITIAL: let's spread the responsibility for this.
• TO NEGOTIATE: to seek a meeting of minds without knocking heads.
• EXPEDITE: to confound confusion with commotion.
• SEE ME OR LET'S DISCUSS IT: come down to my office, I'm lonesome.
• LET'S GET TOGETHER ON THIS: I'm assuming that you're as confused as I am.
• WILL ADVISE YOU IN DUE COURSE: if we figure out what we're doing, we'll let you know.
• GIVE US THE BENEFIT OF YOUR PRESENT THINKING: we'll listen to what you have to say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we've already decided.

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